Solutions

It goes without saying that no-one can say yes to everything. And even when you plan your schedule well, on occasion you may not be able to fulfil a commitment. But how can you make a refusal or cancellation without annoying people?

“I’m very sorry, but …”: in everyday working life it is hard to avoid the odd refusal every now and then. And of course it is very important not to rub your clients or business partners up the wrong way: after all, you want to keep a good working relationship with them in future. So what is required is tact and sensitivity.

Turning down invitations

Invitations always deserve a response – as soon as possible. Once you have made your decision there is no reason to put off replying. If it is still no certain whether your boss can take part, get in touch anyway and ask if you can let them know for sure later on. Your hosts will appreciate it, to help them plan better.

There is no need for refusals or acceptances to be too clinical. Organising an event is hard work, and people are happy to receive a little recognition for it. So what is a good way to answer on behalf of your boss if he is invited to speak at a conference but is unable to attend? “Thank you very much for your enquiry. Unfortunately my schedule does not allow me to take part.” There is nothing to be said against this phrasing, although it is rather dull. “Thank you for asking me to speak at your conference. I was very pleased that you were so interested in my opinion on this topic that you wanted to share it at the conference. So it is with even greater regret that I have to refuse your invitation, as I will be on a business trip abroad on that day. Perhaps it will work out next time? I hope that you soon find a replacement for me and hope that the event goes well for you and your guests.” That sounds more relaxed and personal. At the same time, this example shows what the refusal letter should include: your regret, a good reason and your best wishes for the event. If you refuse an invitation to a birthday, company anniversary or similar celebration, of course, congratulations are also appropriate.

If time does not allow otherwise, if necessary you can also let them know by e-mail, fax or telephone: in any case it is better than not replying at all. In that case, however, you should follow it up with a formal letter of reply, with apologies.

When time is pressing…

However well you plan your boss’s schedule, sometimes something just gets in the way. Let the people involved know as soon as possible – they are expecting the appointment, are preparing for it and may even have booked a flight or hotel room. In that case it is only fair to give them time to change their plans.

If you have to cancel an appointment at short notice, for example if your boss unexpectedly falls ill or is stuck in traffic, it goes without saying that you should also get in touch as soon as possible. You can also avoid being later by leaving gaps between appointments instead of arranging them one right after the other.

Whatever the reason for you to cancel a meeting, if the appointment can be rescheduled you should immediately suggest an alternative time. This makes it clear how important the meeting is to your boss. And of course you need to make a formal apology and explain why the appointment is cancelled or delayed.

When another candidate was better

When a job is advertised, several people will usually apply. This means that you will have to turn down all but one.

Don’t forget that your letter will be a huge disappointment for the recipient; there is nothing you can do about it. However, you can show that you are sensitive to this by not simply fobbing her off in just a few words. There is no need to mention that someone else got the job – that is obvious. Avoid empty phrasing, but do not go into too much detail. What good is it to tell the applicant that she came second? It is cold comfort – and it will be all the more annoying to her to know she only just failed.

Thank her for her application and express your regret at having to turn her down. Stress how hard the decision was. Finally, wish her all the best for the future – that is simply good manners.

Perhaps a quick example will help: “Thank you very much for your application. We did not expect so many applicants to be interested in the post. This made it very hard to come to a decision. Only one candidate can get the post, and we have to disappoint everyone else. It is not an easy task, but we cannot escape it. Please do not see it as a reflection on you personally, but we have the unfortunate task of informing you that you were not selected. We hope that you do not let this dishearten you and that you will soon find a position with another company.”